Thinking of Theresa.
Thinking of my paternal grandmother today, who passed away on this date at 91 in 2009. (pictured as a teenager). I learned a lot from her. And I loved her. She taught me how to type (so I could help her in her antiques shop typing inventory cards). She taught me to always have a bit of my own money, so that I would never be dependent upon anyone. To this end she set up an allowance for me, a dime each week, and I had to count and calculate the tally each time she was ready to dispense the coins.
She taught me that women could do whatever they were capable of, and that no man should tell her otherwise. "Ms." magazine was always on her nightstand.
She taught me that intelligent, strong women could be beautiful, wear red lipstick, have a perfect glossy manicure - and still get their hands dirty by growing organic fruits and veggies.
I blame her for my passion for jewelry, both making it and acquiring it. She had a beautiful collection comprised of gifts of very modern jewelry from my grandfather and Victorian, Edwardian, and Art Nouveau family pieces passed down from her mother and grandmother that sparkled and shone. Trips to the safe deposit box with grandma was like a treasure hunt every time. I adored those times with her. Opening each mysterious leather box and seeing bejeweled butterflies, snakes, and chains. And on milestones she would occasionally allow me to choose something to keep. One year I chose a Silver vermeil lions head that was her grandfathers watch fob. I still have it and it is one my most cherished possessions.
She taught me to work on my interests and hobbies and always learn new things. She was an accomplished singer, trained at Juliard, an expert and speaker on American art glass, antique silver and paperweights, and also a very talented needlepoint artist who designed her own pieces and won awards for her skill and creativity. (pictured is one of her pieces).
She taught me how to love your soulmate long term. My amazing grandfather passed several years before she did, making her last years quite dark and melancholy.
She was a difficult woman. Quick to temper. Had ZERO tolerance for silliness. and believed children should be studious and quiet. This worked well for me, however not so for my sister who was always moving and wanting a playmate. They had quite a different relationship.
Theresa was not the cuddly grandma of hallmark movies. But she was my go-to person always for support, advice, and even a loan if it was needed. She was not however a shoulder to cry on. Open emotion like that was frowned upon as it was uncomfortable.
Born to privilege, to a family of status and raised by French nannies, she somehow emerged one of the most liberal, forward thinking, equality driven women I have ever known. Believing everyone no matter color or gender or sexuality deserved to succeed and should be given the chance.
I miss you grandma. I feel you with me at times. And I wish I could pick up the phone and hear your voice again.
Enjoy a cold glass of Sherry wherever you are.
